Friday, July 22, 2016

Suck Trek Review



Okay so first up is Star Trek Online. Saw a first impression about this online (love Lazy Peon, he baby-rages at games even more than I do - which is alot!), and being incredibly bored and learning that is was "free", figured I'd take a look. And I gotta say this game has some INCREDIBLY GOOD ideas! Unfortunately most of them are terribly implemented. Played for about a week as Federation Tactical, made it up to level 60 in a Vice-Admiral Star Cruiser, got about 10 points into specialization. And in the end I found myself incredibly frustrated with the game.

But let's start with the stuff I liked. Great ideas! Being Star Trek it has alot of past history to draw from. And it does that quite well. Time and again I'd find myself running into things and saying "Oh hey! I remember that!". And the game did a good job of tying stuff in with a new twist or different perspective. Which I gotta say I really enjoyed. And the area designs make it feel like one of the shows - from one of the cheezy 60's sets to more movie-ish areas. So that was kinda fun. Pretty good story-telling for the major missions/arcs. Simple interactive stuff for resource gathering instead of just "press button & wait". Some good RPG elements with setting up your bridge crew, and even the rank & file plebs that make up your crew - all of which you can send on their own little missions.

But then there is the bad part. Which I understand is dangerous territory to walk when you combine MMO fanbois with Star Trek fanbois. But let me just say that if you take my opinion on the game as a personal affront, well then you can go fuck yourself (and that is a personal affront). Right! So all those great ideas above are marred by some pretty spectacularly bad game design. Like fundamental game design not the area/idea design which they did well at. It uses a level system but seems to lack any sense of proper scaling or level/gear requirements. Missions would vary between ROFLstomping enemies with ridiculous ease, to respawn mashing by being one-shot over and over again. And it would often switch back and forth repeatedly in the same mission, which leads to the confusion of "am I specced for this or not?". The physics during ground combat was also particularly bad. NPCs would pop around as they traveled over colliders - one moment on the ground the next five feet in the air. Animations kinda suck, your character ice-skates across the ground. Which was amusing cuz there is an actual mission area with ice that makes your character slide and you could hardly tell the difference (mild exaggeration). And the ground combat itself is some horrible amalgamation of 3rd-person over-shoulder shooter and tab-targeting - which makes the camera go wonky. Abilities don't always trigger when you click them, which not surprisingly gets you dead. Constant graphic glitches with textures popping in and out. The character models are a decade old and lacking facial bones, so your character will always have the same blank expression and cannot blink or even open their mouth. Oh and the DX11 driver issues - you gotta console code the game to force use DX9.

So yeah, in the end I found myself constantly aggravated by the bugs and imbalance to the point where I just didn't want to play anymore. Perhaps it's better if you pay them money? Dunno. Not inspired at all to find out.





Next up is the movie. So checked it out this morning. Needless to say, given the trailers I was not expecting much. But I was pleasantly surprised. It was not terribad! Not to say it was great. I mean come on, it's a Star Trek movie. But it was on the high side of mediocre, perhaps even decent. I'd say better than the previous two. Was expecting more of the super-action MOAR EXPLOSIONZ!! type stuff. Not so much in this one. There was still plenty, but it didn't seem like it overly dominated the film.

Plot was kinda basic, with a little twist at the end. They did go with the old "let's blow up the Enterprise!" gimmick. Don't they do that in every movie? A bit stale and loses the impact after the fourth? fifth? time. But scenery was epic. The starbase stuff was just amazing. Plenty of nods to Nimoy kicking the bucket. Good character interactions. Lot's of ridiculous Trek jargon of using the oscillating gizmo to reconfigure the subspace thingie. Some funny lampshading with Kirk complaining that his life seems episodic. Gay Sulu! Ohhh myyyy! (Cho does such a great job with that character.) And spoiler - Kirk doesn't bang the alien chick. Some things worked, some fell flat. Overall I enjoyed the movie. Probably worth checking out if you enjoy sci-fi.

Tuesday, July 5, 2016

Liberty & Justice - Happy Post 4th and Other Stuff



Happy Post 4th of July! With Liberty & Justice indulging in their typical holiday shenanigans, this time being treated with dignity and respect by our favorite party establishments. It's 41 pics of "subtly veiled" political porn at mongo-bongo-art.com.

Yeah, seriously could not pass up doing this set. Especially this year. This election is just too... well... I don't even know if there is proper word for it. A choice between... the lying corrupt Wicked Witch of Washington who has left a literal trail of dead bodies in her wake... and an insane racist xenophobic cheeto wearing a bad toupe. This is the kinda shit that only happens in bad TV shows. Add into that the utter contempt that "party leaders" seem to have for the will of the voters. Well let's just say that I am somewhat dissatisfied with the state of American politics at the moment. And unlike previous Liberty & Justice sets this one pretty much exactly reflects my views. Just "Grrrrr".

In other news still working on the Warcraft set. Goal is to have it done when the Legion expansion comes out. Which is hilarious that I know when that is, but still have never played the fucking game. But whatever, still in the works. Also planning on doing a Vampire set for Halloween cuz I remember telling somebody I'd do another one. And then perhaps a final Serra set cuz people keep asking for that - dunno though.

And being a terrible friend I completely forgot to mention some sets that got put up on the site LAST MONTH!







First up is a new Zen set! With a Red Sonja inspired set involving "Sonya" trying to recover an emerald Talisman. And staying true to Howard's original character she is an eager submissive slut who will happily spread her legs for any man she encounters, and allow herself to be violated and abused as they please! Or at least that's the way I remember the books. Pretty sure that was her character. Anyway, it's 105 pics of classic Sword & Sorcery goodness in the traditional 1930's pulp standard, available at mongo-bongo-art.com. And remember all sales go directly to the Zen. So if you haven't had a chance to check out the set, get it now!






Also we have a Zafo set featuring our favorite Arabian princess Jasmine. Who has somehow gotten herself captured (when was the last time a Disney princess was kidnapped?) by the evil Jaffar, who for some bizarre reason sends her to the dungeons instead of tapping that sweet brown ass himself. And there she is subjected to variety of humiliating indignities by a vile troll until she begins to like it (cuz hentai logic!). It's 48 pics of empowering Disney family fun at mongo-bongo-art.com. And remember all sales go directly to the Zafo. So support the artiste!





And of course the obligatory movie review! For this installment we have... absolutely nothing. Haven't seen a movie in months. And haven't checked out any new shows that I've particularly wanted to comment on either. I mean I could babble about Game of Thrones or something, but EVERYONE has seen that. So yeah. No movie review.

Monday, May 9, 2016

Civil War & Stuff



So saw Civil War over the weekend. Gotta say, was a fairly good movie. Alot like the second Cpt America movie, but better. Same sort of slow-ish, talky, political/intrigue-y type of thing (but done better), and not so much a constant stream of punchy action. Liked it. And when you compare it to Dawn of Justice, it's like "wtf DC? this is how you do movies". So yeah, a good thumbs-up. Which is not to say I didn't have some beefs with the movie. Cuz I ALWAYS have beefs with the movies, right?

So the actors and characters... I liked them. All of them. Which shocked me. Even Scarlett Johnansson, who I generally think does a terrible Black Widow - she's grown on me. Not the Black Widow I would prefer, but perhaps the one we deserve? Dunno. But she did a great job, even with her moody detached rendition of the character, and it worked well in the context of the film. Big surprise for me was Black Panther. Never been a big fan of the character in the comics. Was just a wee bit too stereotype-y for my tastes. Black super-heroes with "black" in their name just to emphasize just how black they are? Yeah, no thanks. I'll stick with Storm and WarMachine. But this Black Panther? Damn, Boseman knocked it out the fucking park with his portrayal. Complete badass, driven by vengeance, and is the only character to wake the hell up in time before turning things to shit. Good job on the character, and good job on the writing!

Let's see, what else? Oh! The whole "liberty vs security" thing that was pretty much the undercurrent in the comics. Government vs freedom and all that. Wasn't present so much in the movie (shocker!). Film kept it more to the personal level of things instead of broad over-arching political themes. I mean it was there, was just played down quite a bit. Not a huge surprise though. That theme worked well in the context of 2006 when the comic came out, given the administration (or regime as some would call it) at the time. Back then it was fine to preach rebellion against the government. These days...? Yeah, not so much. Especially during an election year. Funny that...

Was kinda bummed that Cap didn't get to give his iconic speech. At least they had it in there, so I'll give them that. But still, it's HIS speech man - let him make it! You don't have Hamlin (Abe's vice-president) give the Gettysburg Address. Lincoln does it, cuz it's HIS defining moment of awesome.




In other news... where the fuck is the new set?! Yeah, well been inconvenienced by some hospital shit lately. No, not me. And no, nothing overly serious. Family member, broken leg that needed some surgery. So been spending some time taking care of that. Chores, shopping, cooking, etc. Which frankly isn't THAT much of an imposition on my normal routine. But my normal routine does involve alot of dicking around before actual "work". And have been sacrificing the work instead of the "dicking around" time. I should probably re-prioritize those two. Hmm.... In any case, still working away on the Belf set and making progress.

But while doing that hospital stuff, I decided to actually try out Hearthstone again. Easy entertainment, no huge time investment, plus they were giving away like 7 packs of the new expansion or something. So figured, what the hell, I'll give it a try. Still won't give them any money, but I'll try it. Plus they were fixing shit with the recent nerfs/changes, right? And that was good for about two days of playing. Caught it right at the end of the "testing shit out" phase. And then it became 24/7 aggro Warlock & Shaman. Which are decks that are broken as fuck. So not alot of fun to be had there for me. Especially when I prefer to play Priest - which has never been a particularly "good" class. And doubly so when I don't give Blizzard money and get the F2P RNG ass-fucking. So that made it a pretty easy decision to un-install. And put me right back to recommending AGAINST the game. Cuz it's still incredibly poorly balanced rng-fest full of toxic shitards.




And also stumbled on some awesome pr0n text browser games done by a guy called Fenoxo. Apparently this stuff has been around like FOREVER, but first I ever came across it. It's your typical semi-linear story game, but focused on having sex with anything and everything. Oh and furries. Lots and lots of furries. And futas. And massive insertions. And egg-laying. It's basically a clusterfuck of complete weirdness. But in a good way! Kinda. I mean you have to have a tolerance for furry stuff. Which admittedly, is not generally my kink - I tend to like my waifus without fur, nor six legs, nor giant tail penises. But the writing is damn good, so it tends to make up for it! And you can generally avoid the shit that's too much of a turn-off for you - like six-legged tail-penis furries. He's got a fantasy and a sci-fi game. Both are pretty much the same thing but with different trappings. Sci-fi one seems a bit better in set-up and writing. And neither needs to be downloaded, just play in a window. So check 'em out!

Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Amilee Bathtub



Hey look! I can actually make a set of my very own. Amazing! With my favorite postergirl of the site, Amilee. Posing in some solo centerfold shots while taking a bath. It's 30 pics of squeaky clean goodness at mongo-bongo-art.com.

So yeah, it's a set. Once again, pretty fucking amazing I can actually produce one. So played with ALOT of shit in this one. Major part being the geometry morphing / reshaping I mentioned in my last post. And since the pics are in chronological order (there's no particular story-telling in this one) you can see how it progressed as I played with it. And keep in mind I didn't postwork any of her body (just adding soap suds etc), so all of it is just straight render. And if you are sitting there staring blankly saying "So the fuck what?!", then you have no idea of the horror involved in V4's joint bends. Trust me, they would get nasty in most, if not all, of those pics. Requiring plenty of postwork which inevitably leads to a loss of texture and lighting errors in the final pic. So yeah, I'm pretty damn proud of the job I did on that.

Some other things I played with in this were six raytrace bounces for full reflection/refraction through the glass tub. Which came out nice, but is NOT something Poser does well at all. Each render took forever, some up to 20 hours. It is a truly terrible program compared to most others in this day and age. Though tbh I haven't tried the newest version, Poser 11. And probably never will. Cuz I simply don't trust Smithmicro anymore after the ass-fucking they gave me with PoserPro GameDev (which was HORRIBLE). Maybe Poser 11 is good, but fuck them. Not giving them money to find out. Anyway.... Also tried a faked Depth-of-Field effect for the background. Wasn't really liking the grainy-ness of Poser's built-in DoF. In some ways I liked how this turned out, and in other ways not so much. Still need to play around with it more. Oh and also did some reflections on the skin - which admittedly is fairly standard for most artists these days. Cuz human skin (like just about everything else in the world) is reflective to one extent or another. But first time I tried it out with a concentrated attempt. Combined with the multiple raytraces and the sub-surface scattering probably didn't help the render times. Still liked how it turned out, and will probably use it some more in the future.

In other news, got hooked into EvE-Online again. Big war to wipe out the Goons, and who can't pass that up? Sure Goons were fun and all once, but they kinda turned into the very thing they originally fought against - massively arrogant nullsec-renting shitlords who take the game too seriously. And that's why they need to die. Plus they probably pissed alot of people off with their scamming and ganking. If you have no clue wtf I'm talking about, don't worry - it's an EvE thing. So yeah, EvE is the reason why finishing up the postwork on this set took a bit longer than necessary. But fortunately for you guys, CCP never got around to fixing some of the broken things in the game. So the luster has worn off and the honeymoon was short-lived. So while I'll play it a bit, it won't be the time-consuming life-killing monster it normally was. So I'm back to work on the Belf / Old Gods set!







And also we have a new set from Zafo! With a parody of KanColle. Which if you are too lazy to click the link, is a Japanese browser game & anime featuring cute girls as the personifications of ships from WWII and fighting against demons from beneath the sea. Yeah, I know, only the Japanese. Gotta love 'em! Still it's funny as hell and there is a metric shit-ton of Rule34 porn out there for it.

And in this case we have Bismarck attacked by an Abyssal while in dock, taking multiple broadsides fore and aft, and having all her chambers flooded (with cum). It's 36 pics of historically accurate WWII naval battles at mongo-bongo-art.com. And remember all sales go directly to the artist!



Sunday, April 3, 2016

Upcoming Stuff?




Some random stuff I've been bouncing around in my head for awhile. First is an Amilee solo set that is pretty much completely done except for some postwork. So should see that pretty soon. Stemmed from playing around with the original pic I did last year. Was disliking some of the geometry / joint bend issues that keep showing up, so decided to play around with the Morph Tool to smooth out bends and add bulk where needed. Turned out decently and started using it in the Belf-Worgen and Mynxie sets. And then finally "mastered" it finishing up this Amilee set. Morph Tool is possibly the only thing left that makes Poser worthwhile. Though since they switched to using the Blender Cycles render engine for Poser 11, and Blender can do much better at modifying geometry, I guess there isn't really any good reason to use Poser anymore. Just use Blender (which is completely free!). LOL. Good job Smithmicro!

Next is a Warcraft set that I'm currently working on. Obviously inspired by the upcoming Hearthstone expansion - Whispers of the Old Gods. New set, along with rule changes phasing out some older overpowered cards, plus some nerf/buffs to basic cards to fix some broken shit that's been around since the beginning of the game. Almost made me want to play again. Then I remembered how toxic and shitty the Hearthstone community is, and how the RNG is skewed against folks who haven't paid them money. And add on to that Blizzard's recent choice with Overwatch/Tracer. Fuck that, and fuck Blizzard.

And then some other ideas I've been playing with. A Groknar set which amazingly does NOT include an elf chick. Almost every set I've done includes an elf - I think I may have a problem. And then some Peach and Zelda goodness, cuz it's been like 2 years since the last set. But then again I've barely done any sets since then, so maybe that's the reason why. And then lastly some Shadowrun Returns crap, cuz why not? And I wanted to play around with the idea of doing text/comic that alot of people have suggested to me. Which while I like the challenge of trying to convey stories without using text (and I'm vain enough to think I do a pretty good job of it) some stories you do need text for, and that one would.






Derp! Completely forgot to mention RedRobot's new set. Some beasty fun with a police officer taking it hard and fast from her canine partner. It's 124 pics of hardcore police action at mongo-bongo-art.com. So check it out if you are into that sort of thing.

Sunday, March 27, 2016

Easter, Superheroes, & Pr0n


Right, so haven't posted in a while. First off, Happy Easter! Which of course wouldn't be complete without a bunny girl. Got some other shit that I'm working on as well, but I'll talk about that in a later post in a couple days or so. Got lots of other crap to drone on about first, like what the hell I've been up to lately. Mostly just dicking around. Pretty much no work AT ALL, on anything of consequence for a few months. Completely lazy. Was doing some MMO raiding for a bit until that got boring. Tried out a bunch of other MMOs, nothing really stuck. Did XCOM of course. And binge watched alot of series. Recently checked out some superhero shows and saw Batman v Superman on Friday so figured I'd do some reviews.




Starting with the big one, Batman v Superman. Not all that great, sadly. It wasn't terrible, but wasn't very good. And surprisingly Ben Affleck wasn't the worst part. Went in expecting to hate on him hard, but he actually did an okay job. And it was just okay - his version of Bruce Wayne was just 24/7 "Grrrr.... I'm consumed by rage!". So not alot of depth, but at least he didn't screw it up. Though he did use alot of guns and kill alot of people, which last I checked were like the only two things that Batman is supposed to be completely against - but whatever. With all the other weird crap in the movie you just sorta shrug that off.

If there is one word I would use to describe the movie it would be "tedious drama". Because that is one word. Really. But yeah, lots of drama. Longggg drawn out drama. In sepia and graytone! First 10 minutes of the movie were just excruciating. Everybody already knows Batman's backstory. And if they don't, a tediously artsy retelling of it isn't going to explain it. But after that crappy shit part things start to pick up. It's still packed full of "drama" and washed-out graytone, but at least it's developing plot. It's grim-dark gritty and hammers you with "drama" throughout, with no humor to lighten the mood even once. So put on your serious pants. Cuz this movie is serious business... or something.

So anyway, Superman is the same same as last movie. Grim-dark gritty and all that. Which was fine. Not very inspirational, but still okay. Lois Lane was an extraneous damsel who needed saving, and did crazy shit like throw away the spear, then go back to get the spear, then get trapped, just so Superman can stop fighting for a second, save her, and then go back to fighting. If you're going to make a character so damn pointless, why even bother having them in the film? They could have done a much better job with her. Wonder Woman kicked ass. I think mostly because they didn't give her many lines, so she didn't get covered with grim-dark grittiness. She just got to look hot and kick ass. Will be interesting to see how her movie turns out. Hopefully won't be directed by Snyder. And for the one character that really really sucked ass - Lex Luthor. His character has historically been a criminal mastermind, a plotting genius, a racist xenophobe, and generally cool, calm, collected, and in control. But in this film they made him a mop-headed Mark Zuckerberg with a nervous twitch and giggles alot. Oh, and he's an insane Darkseid fanatic.... Yeah. His character just didn't work. It's like he wanted to be the Joker instead of Lex Luthor. Really fucked up every scene involving him - which was alot of the movie unfortunately.

Other easter eggs and drops they included were kinda cool. The other Justice League characters - Cyborg, Flash, and Aquaman. Gonna be weird seeing Khal Drogo as Aquaman, but guess it's better than if they used Vince from Entourage - LOL. Also did a cool tie-in with the Flashpoint story. And some future vision of Darkseid's invasion with Parademons and the whole lot. And Doomsday was pretty cool. All the crap building up to Doomsday was kinda silly - but once he was out and about it was kinda fun.

In any case, the movie was just "meh". Wasn't great, wasn't complete shit. Just was. Matinee tickets at best. Or catch it on netflix or whatever later.




Next up is Jessica Jones. So yeah, this one started out really good. First few episodes were kick ass. Doctor Who as the bad guy was epic. Jessica Jones was hard and edgey. But as the show went on it just... it just fucking turned to shit. It became like a constant shitshow of Law & Order. By the end of the season every single white guy is psychotic and/or evil, every single black guy is noble and awesome, all women are right all the time, and just blah, blah, blah.

Fucking come on, man. That shit does not make a good show. It's like some ass-clown is trying to forcefeed me affirmative action as entertainment. Doesn't work. It just becomes offensive and boring. Which sucks because so much of the rest of the series was fantastic. Beneath all "message" bullshit there was a really great story. Pity they didn't focus on telling it. Personally I don't recommend the show. But I have a rather low tolerance for people trying to cram their ideologies down my throat under the guise of "entertainment". If you aren't as easily as triggered as I am (I had to retreat to a safe space and get counseling), then you might wanna check it out. But don't say I didn't warn you.




And last but not least is Daredevil. Similar to Jessica Jones, this one started out strong and got worse over time. But for different reasons. And not quite as bad. The fight throughout are pretty good - acrobatic and well-choreographed, but after awhile they just get kinda tired. I found myself fast-forwarding thru them after a point cuz they stopped doing anything to progress the plot. It was just fighting for fighting's sake. Boring.

Anyway it starts out strong with good villains and the mystery of "just what are these nefarious individuals up to?". And that's pretty much the draw of the entire series. Sure as hell isn't the main characters and their poorly defined motives. Which just become even more threadbare and transparent as the series continues. Murdoch doesn't seem to have any decently justified motivation for abandoning the law and going all vigilante. He never seemed to experience the law failing him which would drive him to that extreme. So we just sorta need to accept he gets to beat people up, and then listen to him condescendingly preach about justice. And lump on to that all the weepy melodramatic bullshit of the other main characters relationships. Where the only way to deal with problems is to start yelling and/or crying while flipping out over relatively minor shit. About halfway thru the first season I completely wrote off the main crew as lost causes. And it only gets worse once you hit season 2.

Frankly, the main characters suck and the only reason to watch is for Wilson Fisk. He's easily the most interesting person in the show. He actually has believable motivations and background. And his sidekick Wesley seems like far more of a devoted friend than among the relationships of Daredevil and his band of jackasses. In fact, the first season is more of Fisk's tragic story than it is Daredevil's ascension to hero. It's Fisk and Wesley who actually have a purpose and make sense in their own misguided ways. While Daredevil just sort of bumbles along getting his ass kicked, does alot of self-pitying whining, followed by hypocritical justifications.

So the first season is worth checking out. It's pretty good, even if they do steal shit from other movies and shows (the writers had a serious hard-on for The Matrix). You can even make a drinking game out of it for every time you recognize a scene from a different movie. (You'll get drunk real quick.) Season 2 isn't quite as good. It has Elektra, but she all too quickly devolves into a damsel that needs saving. It also has the "all Asians are evil ninjas". I shit you not, they are all evil and they all know martial arts - every, single, one. Totally not racist. And it has twice as much whiny melodrama from the main characters. Y'know what, just skip the second season, it sucked ass. SPOILER - There's crappy ninjas, bad Punisher drama, Elektra shows up, turns out she is the ninja-Jesus, and then she dies, but since she's Jesus she'll come back to life. Fin.








Also RedRobot has three sets - some new, some not so new. The newest is Captain Maria and the Goblin Treasure, with a pirate queen getting a gangbang from a pair of sinister goblins. Then there is the continuation of the the Helen Black story where she encounters Jeh the Succubus and her vampire minions, and get a rough pounding from futas. And then there is Hallow's Escape from the Minotaur's Lair. So check them out! His stuff just keeps getting better.








And also Zen has his Practicing Witchcraft set which he released quite awhile ago. A sexy young blonde witch-in-training has a summons go wrong and gets double-stuffed with demon cock. I put it up on the site a month or so ago, but forgot to make a blog post about it. So if you haven't already checked it out, go buy it and give it a look-see.